This Is Not - 5/6/25

What? It has been 6 months. 
I already told napoleon everything yesterday.
What else? 
Danny died.
What else?
My new analyst disappointed me. 
It’s not a secret. Dull, deadly disappointment. Amnesia protects—protection causes amnesia. 

I am not currently—no longer, for now—scared of being discovered—to be missing. Now, saddened by and lonely with the knowledge that I’m not here, I bloat with the quickness of my having noticed, having caught my missingness before my playmates.